Tweet
And Steve Smith is still running. Using my unique ability to read lips through a helmet, I can hear him saying, “Mike Martz is a total idiot”. I believe it was last year when I claimed I could predict how games should go, but I can’t predict when a coach is going to do something so totally idiotic it screws up my day. Last week was filled with ‘em. Yes, I would have tried to score from the 15 if I’m the Rams coach who goes for fourth down and 9 in the second quarter. Yes, I would have let Ahman Green run right at the spot where the big Eagles defensive lineman fell down. Isn’t it ironic that Brett Farve lofted one hail mary too many? I’m sure God is thinking, “What more do you want me to do? I took out the Eagles defensive line for you.” Or maybe it was me, I did take a prop against Ahman Green to extend my prop losing streak to oh-and-427. (Hey, the Eagles swore to a man they would key on Green and let Farve beat them! Okay, maybe they weren’t lying, maybe they did key on Green and couldn’t do squat to stop him. I think taking props +1XX must be sucker bets.)
This was the kind of week you just throw your hands up in the air. All the dogs covered. Two pulled off upsets. If the Packers had made it three, I truly would have turned to divine intervention or my own unique black cat “powers” as the only plausible explanation. In the 2nd round of the playoffs? You got to be kidding me. Next year, teams will truly have hope when they slip into the playoffs. No longer will they feel like the Harlem Globtrotters opponent, or an Olympic team playing the USA in basketball. I’m sure within 2 years or so, it’ll be back to the way it was but this could have serious ramifications next season. Speaking of which, if I play on the Rams, I’m pretty certain I’ve lost faith in my coach. On one call, the Greatest Show on Turf bit the dust. They will never be associated with “great” again. Might as well can Martz now. And what are the Bears doing hiring Lovie Smith? Obviously burning the game film. I’m no defensive genius, but they got into field goal position almost every drive of the game, and 9-of-17 on 3rd down, including a TD and several 10+ yard first downs isn’t what you stress in team meetings.
Let me take a moment to announce that this is my final column. Chalk that claim up with Mario Lemiux’s retirement, Gibbs ending his career in Washington, and “I’ll never drink again”. I’ve been pretty happy with the quality of this column, but my personal efforts are in the toilet. I don’t know, when I lay out every week and say the Carolina Panthers are undervalued on the line and should be rated like a team headed to the NFC championship, and they don’t cover for a month but end up in the NFC Championship. What is that? A good call? A bad call that’s unlucky?? The Panthers have really underperformed this year and their double-OT win is consistent with the miracle you’d think an 8-8 team would need to make the playoffs. So are they an 8-8 team in the NFC Championship? Anyway...I just don’t have the time to bang these out every week with the kind of preparation I’d really like to put in it. I’d claim it was taking away from my efforts but that would probably be a lie. This year, some of my best angles that came from hard work were flat-out flops. The only thing that consistently won? Bet line value. When I went against line value, flop. When I saw no line value but liked a side for whatever crazy ass reason, flop. So I’m closing down shop, going out on the bottom of the heap tail between my legs. In my own eyes, I don’t have credibility to write this anymore, no matter how on cue my insights and comments may or may not be. More importantly, I rarely even have the time to bang out the offbeat humor.
So here are my final calls. Since I obviously will be right from hereon out, I’ll just address the Superbowl now.
Indy vs. NE
I felt there was a hunger in Indy from Tony Dungy’s embarrassment by the Tampa SB last year and Manning’s failure in the playoffs. Riding into the wild card round, the Colts offense looked terrible though and I abandoned my own prediction. They don’t look so bad now, do they? Just a couple weekends ago, I wondered in this column if Payton Manning was embarking on a “pre-destined run”. Hey, the dude is a quality first NFL pick and those guys get to superbowls. Look it up. I look at NE and can only think one thing: Lawyer Milloy is a Buffalo Bill. I remember many years back when the 49ers lost Jerry Rice and it was like “Oh, the season is over”. The season wasn’t over, but when they got to the championship game that year, it was clear they were missing an offensive weapon. When Harrison runs that post pattern against the Patriots run-stopping safety, I see dead people. The Patriots also have a nasty achilles heel: the punter. 32 for a long last week isn’t inspiring. Giving Manning a short field to work with – in that quick huddle they were exposing last week? Points baby, lots and lots of points. And don’t forget about the Edge. At one time, we all thought he was going to be a great great one. He’s better than the guy for NE. The AFC sent the best passing team last year – and in most years – and will likely do so again.
COLTS WIN.
Eagles vs. Carolina
If the Colts win, I’ve already spoiled the Eagles/Carolina game for the straight-up bettor. You can’t expect two more upsets this year, can you? That’s probably the best way to look at this game because I don’t know what else to make of these two teams – other than to say that the Superbowl champion has probably been decided by the outcome of the NE/Indy game. What, you thought the Superbowl is the matchup of the two best teams in the league??? Rarely! In Carolina’s favor, they play better without Davis for whatever reason (more aggressive play calling?) How will the Eagles slow down the Panthers running game? I don’t know but my overall feeling is the Panthers just aren’t quite there yet on offense or defense. It doesn’t take a genius to correlate the Eagles resurgence with a certain fat republicans ill-conceived comments but why would those comments matter? I don’t think they did, aside from the fact that I think Donovan McNabb realized for the first time that in reaching the NFC championship game, he had in fact accomplished NOTHING. I doubt he realized that before. You’d think it would be enough to have reached that point for a couple years for people to accept defacto that you are a great QB, but Rush shattered that illusion. Maybe Kordell did too. So between that and the hype on Vick – which is no doubt an insult to current established QBs with serious running AND passing ability -- McNabb was motivated into a great season. (Hey, look at McNair, he also seemed a bit inspired, didn’t the co-MVP?) So in Donovan we trust. His season has also been about getting to the next level and I expect that to show. I can’t imagine that Carolina isn’t just thrilled to be where they are, because they really should be.
Colts -3 Eagles
With two weeks to prepare, this is going to be a lopsided game. Certainly coach Dungy and coach Reid deserve this matchup. It’ll be a great matchup. Eagles are the more balanced and more even team, but the Colts clearly have the superstars, particularly on offense. By being here, I assume Indy overcame the NE defense in style and that would be damn impressive. Knowing that, the Eagles don’t really scare you so much, so I’ll go Colts.
Colts win the Superbowl. Peyton Manning wins MVP of the game. And the long wait till next season begins. Looks for the Skins to draft RB Steven Jackson. Will Gibbs ever beat Parcells? Just cause the Bears new #1 goal is to beat the Packers, don’t expect that rivalry to change – Farve already plays that game as if it is HIS #1 goal. Now, I gotta go explain to my son that football season ends after 3 more games. The Superbowl truly is a bittersweet moment.
And Steve Smith is still running.
I hope someone out there with better discipline used this column to make some $$$. More importantly, I hope someone out there enjoyed reading this column every week!
"I'm not gambling, I'm strategically funding exotic resorts"
Take care,
THE BLACK CAT
This was the kind of week you just throw your hands up in the air. All the dogs covered. Two pulled off upsets. If the Packers had made it three, I truly would have turned to divine intervention or my own unique black cat “powers” as the only plausible explanation. In the 2nd round of the playoffs? You got to be kidding me. Next year, teams will truly have hope when they slip into the playoffs. No longer will they feel like the Harlem Globtrotters opponent, or an Olympic team playing the USA in basketball. I’m sure within 2 years or so, it’ll be back to the way it was but this could have serious ramifications next season. Speaking of which, if I play on the Rams, I’m pretty certain I’ve lost faith in my coach. On one call, the Greatest Show on Turf bit the dust. They will never be associated with “great” again. Might as well can Martz now. And what are the Bears doing hiring Lovie Smith? Obviously burning the game film. I’m no defensive genius, but they got into field goal position almost every drive of the game, and 9-of-17 on 3rd down, including a TD and several 10+ yard first downs isn’t what you stress in team meetings.
Let me take a moment to announce that this is my final column. Chalk that claim up with Mario Lemiux’s retirement, Gibbs ending his career in Washington, and “I’ll never drink again”. I’ve been pretty happy with the quality of this column, but my personal efforts are in the toilet. I don’t know, when I lay out every week and say the Carolina Panthers are undervalued on the line and should be rated like a team headed to the NFC championship, and they don’t cover for a month but end up in the NFC Championship. What is that? A good call? A bad call that’s unlucky?? The Panthers have really underperformed this year and their double-OT win is consistent with the miracle you’d think an 8-8 team would need to make the playoffs. So are they an 8-8 team in the NFC Championship? Anyway...I just don’t have the time to bang these out every week with the kind of preparation I’d really like to put in it. I’d claim it was taking away from my efforts but that would probably be a lie. This year, some of my best angles that came from hard work were flat-out flops. The only thing that consistently won? Bet line value. When I went against line value, flop. When I saw no line value but liked a side for whatever crazy ass reason, flop. So I’m closing down shop, going out on the bottom of the heap tail between my legs. In my own eyes, I don’t have credibility to write this anymore, no matter how on cue my insights and comments may or may not be. More importantly, I rarely even have the time to bang out the offbeat humor.
So here are my final calls. Since I obviously will be right from hereon out, I’ll just address the Superbowl now.
Indy vs. NE
I felt there was a hunger in Indy from Tony Dungy’s embarrassment by the Tampa SB last year and Manning’s failure in the playoffs. Riding into the wild card round, the Colts offense looked terrible though and I abandoned my own prediction. They don’t look so bad now, do they? Just a couple weekends ago, I wondered in this column if Payton Manning was embarking on a “pre-destined run”. Hey, the dude is a quality first NFL pick and those guys get to superbowls. Look it up. I look at NE and can only think one thing: Lawyer Milloy is a Buffalo Bill. I remember many years back when the 49ers lost Jerry Rice and it was like “Oh, the season is over”. The season wasn’t over, but when they got to the championship game that year, it was clear they were missing an offensive weapon. When Harrison runs that post pattern against the Patriots run-stopping safety, I see dead people. The Patriots also have a nasty achilles heel: the punter. 32 for a long last week isn’t inspiring. Giving Manning a short field to work with – in that quick huddle they were exposing last week? Points baby, lots and lots of points. And don’t forget about the Edge. At one time, we all thought he was going to be a great great one. He’s better than the guy for NE. The AFC sent the best passing team last year – and in most years – and will likely do so again.
COLTS WIN.
Eagles vs. Carolina
If the Colts win, I’ve already spoiled the Eagles/Carolina game for the straight-up bettor. You can’t expect two more upsets this year, can you? That’s probably the best way to look at this game because I don’t know what else to make of these two teams – other than to say that the Superbowl champion has probably been decided by the outcome of the NE/Indy game. What, you thought the Superbowl is the matchup of the two best teams in the league??? Rarely! In Carolina’s favor, they play better without Davis for whatever reason (more aggressive play calling?) How will the Eagles slow down the Panthers running game? I don’t know but my overall feeling is the Panthers just aren’t quite there yet on offense or defense. It doesn’t take a genius to correlate the Eagles resurgence with a certain fat republicans ill-conceived comments but why would those comments matter? I don’t think they did, aside from the fact that I think Donovan McNabb realized for the first time that in reaching the NFC championship game, he had in fact accomplished NOTHING. I doubt he realized that before. You’d think it would be enough to have reached that point for a couple years for people to accept defacto that you are a great QB, but Rush shattered that illusion. Maybe Kordell did too. So between that and the hype on Vick – which is no doubt an insult to current established QBs with serious running AND passing ability -- McNabb was motivated into a great season. (Hey, look at McNair, he also seemed a bit inspired, didn’t the co-MVP?) So in Donovan we trust. His season has also been about getting to the next level and I expect that to show. I can’t imagine that Carolina isn’t just thrilled to be where they are, because they really should be.
Colts -3 Eagles
With two weeks to prepare, this is going to be a lopsided game. Certainly coach Dungy and coach Reid deserve this matchup. It’ll be a great matchup. Eagles are the more balanced and more even team, but the Colts clearly have the superstars, particularly on offense. By being here, I assume Indy overcame the NE defense in style and that would be damn impressive. Knowing that, the Eagles don’t really scare you so much, so I’ll go Colts.
Colts win the Superbowl. Peyton Manning wins MVP of the game. And the long wait till next season begins. Looks for the Skins to draft RB Steven Jackson. Will Gibbs ever beat Parcells? Just cause the Bears new #1 goal is to beat the Packers, don’t expect that rivalry to change – Farve already plays that game as if it is HIS #1 goal. Now, I gotta go explain to my son that football season ends after 3 more games. The Superbowl truly is a bittersweet moment.
And Steve Smith is still running.
I hope someone out there with better discipline used this column to make some $$$. More importantly, I hope someone out there enjoyed reading this column every week!
"I'm not gambling, I'm strategically funding exotic resorts"
Take care,
THE BLACK CAT
You out did yourself here in your final column, but I agree with your analysis. I also think the Colts will beat the Eagles in the Super Bowl. Good luck, because I am going the same way. As for funding the resorts: I can't seem to win doing the online betting thing, and the reason is discipline. They offer too many options for the bettor. It is like a kid in a candy store. I AM DONE WITH THAT!!!! AND IT DIDN'T TAKE BUT $200 FOR ME TO LEARN. IF YOU WANT TO COME OUT AHEAD YOU JUST CAN'T BET ON TOO MANY THINGS, AND I HAVE MY BEST RESULTS STICKING WITH SIDES ONLY. EVERYTIME I PLAY TOTALS, PARLAYS, TEASERS, HALF TIMERS,ETC. I LOSE IN THE LONG RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comment