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In this final post on my recent travel experiences, I will first describe my time in Margarita Island, and then conclude with a report on the Philippines and Thailand. To be honest, the Philippines and Thailand have nothing to do with sportsbetting. However, it is obvious that many Bettorsworld members would enjoy hearing about these places. And I, of course, would enjoy writing about them. So, here goes.
Margarita Island, which is part of Venezuela, is home to a few offshore sportsbooks: Skybook, Margarita, and Players Only. (If I’m missing a book, someone let us know.) The only one that I currently play with is Skybook. I had briefly played with Margarita a couple of years ago when they absorbed my E-Z Bet account, but because they weren’t online I never re-upped when I blew-out the money in the account.
Roger of WWTS, my trip coordinator, had first connected me with Lance, one of the 3 co-owners of Skybook. Once I arrived on the island, Lance and Art, also a co-owner, served as my hosts. And what hosts these guys were! Naturally, they got me special rates on my hotel and rental car. Beyond that, they wined and dined me every night, and even paid for table dances at the girlie bars. Not only do these guys know how to have a good time, they also know how to be generous and include others. Whenever we went out, they would invite one or more employees of Skybook to join us and share in the fun. And everywhere we went, Lance and Art were loved for being great guys and generous tippers.
When I first arrived, I got to see Skybook’s old office, which looked like it had close to a hundred stations. When I left, 6 days later, they had just moved into a new building. Unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to see the new office. When I return, and I definitely want to, I’ll visit the new facilities.
The third co-owner of Skybook is Mitch (a.k.a. Sky). My only interaction with Mitch was a brief greeting when I toured the old office. My take is that you need a crow bar to pry Mitch away from the computer screen. The man is obviously too intent on his BM business to waste time socializing.
Skybook is a partnership that makes sense. Art and Lance are from New York, and are thus able to command a large customer base from the true #1 sportbetting state in the USA. And Mitch is from Vegas, and brings in big players from there. Since much of their clientele comes from New York and Vegas, it is easy to understand why Skybook is an office that has an abnormally high percentage of wiseguys playing into it.
Each partner handles a different sport and employs a different booking philosophy. Art, for example, takes a conservative approach to making and moving lines. Lance, on the other hand, who is charge of their baseball lines, is quite opinionated. Consequently, since Lance will offer a 10-cent baseball line, and he has the balls and knowledge to vary his numbers considerably from the consensus line, Skybook could very well prove to be the industry-leading offshore book this coming baseball season.
In my opinion, Art and Lance are completely honorable straight shooters, and I now have no worries about maintaining a large balance with them. I even told them that I had been concerned during baseball when they went to all post-up and started offering very different baseball lines. And they understood my concern, which, of course, is now zilch.
It is obvious that Skybook is very successful. In addition to moving their office to fancy new digs, these guys have bought homes and investment property on the island, and they will soon buy their own girlie bar. Undoubtedly, they will lure the best-looking women on the island to work for them. What I have to do is to convince them to advertise in Caracas (the capital of Venezuela) for dancers. Caracas has some of the most beautiful women in the world. If they can bring in some knockouts from there, they can turn Margarita Island into one of the top Latin American sex havens in the world. And the next time I visit, I’ll certainly stay much longer than 6 days.
Interestingly enough, Players Only (run by Patrick) already owns a bar on the island: Fat Boys. It is a disco bar that plays loud “techno” music. As everyone knows, alcohol kills brain cells. However, the brain cells destroyed by alcohol are nothing compared to those decimated by loud techno music. Combine the two and you get a deadly synergistic combination that in a few nights can reduce your IQ by 20 points.
When I walked over to Fat Boys, I saw guys staggering out of the bar, mumbling something to the effect that prior to visiting Fat Boys they had been 57% handicappers, and that now, after a few sessions at Fat Boys, their winning percentage had dropped to 47%. No wonder Patrick invites his winning players to visit Margarita Island.
One night at a girlie bar, Lance and Art and I were drinking with Justin and Jeremy from Margarita Sportsbook. And Justin, who had learned from Bettorsworld that I was a Haagen-Dazs addict, asked me if I knew about the Haagen-Dazs ice cream store in the nearby Rattan Center. Hell, I was insulted by the question. I mean, asking me if I know about the nearest Haagen-Dazs outlet is like asking Bubba Clinton if he knows about the closest source for Viagra. Naturally, I knew about that Haagen-Dazs outlet, especially since it was the only place on the entire island where one could procure this incomparable gourmet ice cream.
Now, I’m sure that many of you are asking why Haagen-Dazs is such an incomparable gourmet ice cream. And some of you who are fettered by undeveloped taste buds may even, in your sentient ignorance, prefer Ben & Jerry’s. Well, live in confusion and ignorance no more. This true ice cream Guru will enlighten everyone in Bettorsworld as to the reasons for the superiority of Haagen-Dazs. Simply meditate deeply on the soon-to-follow reasons for the superiority of Haagen-Dazs, and you too can become a respected Master in the arcane field of ice creamism.
Before listing the advantages of Haagen-Dazs, I want to diverge a bit and talk about Ben and Jerry, the guys who own Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. Ben and Jerry are super nice guys who have done a lot of good things for Vermont, the state they live in. Furthermore, like yours truly, each guy is Jewish and a died in the wool Deadhead (Grateful Dead fanatic). I really love these guys. Unfortunately, there is just one problem: I don’t care for their ice cream. I got real excited when Cherry Garcia ice cream debuted, but then I tasted it, and ick! Furthermore, it is my theory (and probably Oliver Stone’s, too) that Cherry Garcias may have contributed to Jerry Garcia’s demise. There is no doubt that Jerry did himself no good by hammering heroin into his veins on a regular basis. But check out his gut. You get a gut like that from sucking down too many Cherry Garcias. Anyway, to make a long story short, I am so ashamed and upset that two fellow Jews can produce an ice cream that bad, I have renounced Judaism. Now, when Passover arrives, I simply pass it over. I have even renounced my membership in the Sandy Koufax fan club and discarded my Sammy Davis Jr. albums. Hell, I even started eating pork. Anyway, now that I have unburdened my heart in Bettorsworld, let me first wipe away my tears and then continue with the list of reasons for Haagen-Dazs’s superiority...Here goes:
1. Haagen-Dazs is made with all natural ingredients and contains no preservatives or chemical additives. (Most commercial ice creams contain pernicious ingredients like mono and diglycerides and polysorbate 80, which, as anyone who reads trade magazines on food engineering know, is even more harmful to one’s health than polysorbate 90.)
2. Haagen-Dazs contains no corn syrup. If you ever check the list of ingredients in cheap ice cream products or low-fat dairy products (such as frozen yogurt), you will notice that corn syrup is near the front. That means that a high percentage of the product contains this cheap, sickly tasting sweetener that is often used to mask taste deficiencies or the absence of fat.
3. Haagen-Dazs contains no carrageenan. Carrageenan is fancy name for seaweed. It adds a false sticky, gooey texture to ice cream. The only sportbetting people who could ever prefer carrageenan in their ice cream are the guys at Looselines, who obviously have a mermaid fetish.
4. Haagen-Dazs has no air pumped into it. I can understand adding air to tires and balloons, and even shoes. But what is the purpose of adding air to ice cream? In reality, what it does is fill up space, making you falsely think that you are getting more ice cream for your money. A pint of air-free Haagen Dazs weighs the same as most quarts of the cheap commercial, chemical-laden stuff. The fact that Haagen-Dazs is denser due to its lack of air also means that its flavor is richer and more intense.
5. Haagen-Dazs simply tastes the best. The late great football coach George Allen, a perfectionist if there ever were one, and a self-admitted ice cream addict, swore by Haagen-Dazs. And that is why I now have a picture of George on my living room wall, right next to those of the Poker Players and Billy Walters.
Now, although I was able to satisfy my Haagen-Dazs cravings at the local Rattan Center, the price for the ice cream was outrageous. In Nevada, I pay roughly $3.25 for a pint of the stuff. And in St. Marteen/St. Martin and Aruba (Note: I couldn’t find it in Curacao), a pint cost $4.75. But at the Rattan Center, they ripped me off for $7.25 a pint.
In fact, this unconscionable price fixing is dastardly enough to have even caused repercussions in the sportsbetting industry. For proof, consider the following facts: The biggest mystery in the offshore industry has long been why Del Mar and Looseline left lovely Margarita Island for the god-forsaken hinterlands of Belize. This mystery has ranked right up there with Mona Lisa’s smile and the riddle of the Sphinx. Well, now I have solved the mystery. These guys deserted Margarita because of unacceptable Haagen Dazs prices. They just got sick of the price fixing scam and headed to Belize.
Although Del Mar and Looselines chose to switch rather than fight, you better believe that I won’t take such price-gouging lying down. Although I hate politics and governments, in this instance it was imperative that I become actively involved. With this in mind, I have sent letters to the U.S. government insisting that it enforce an oil embargo against Venezuela until its Haagen Dazs prices are in line with those of other countries of the world.
In fact, I feel so strongly about this issue, I am even supporting George Bush Senior (not Junior) for president. Not only does George Sr. have the backing of Texas oil money (and power), which could put the clamps on Venezuela, he also exhibits impeccable personal behavior. I have the utmost respect for George Sr. The fact that this man can get still “do” Barbara absolutely amazes me. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think Barbara is a great lady, far sweeter than Hilary. And I couldn’t think of any gal that I’d rather have bake me a batch of chocolate chip cookies. But the truth is, they could main-line mega-doses of Viagra into my genitalia, and I still couldn’t get “it” up for Barbara. I admit it. George Bush is a far better man then I am. George Bush Jr. on the other hand, suffers from the same kind of dissolute personal habits that have plagued Bubba Clinton and Ted Kennedy. In terms of person comportment, he even reminds me of myself. I prefer a president like Bush Sr., Ronald Reagan, or Jimmy Carter (who confessed to lust in his heart but not in his crank) that doesn’t stray from the straight and narrow. The president is a leader and role model who needs to be held to a higher standard of moral behavior than do common, degenerate blokes like myself.
Well, enough of ice creamism for now. It is time to assess the pros and cons of Margarita Island. First, the pros: 1) Fantastic, nearly deserted beaches. And some of these beaches have great waves for surfing.
2) Passionate, sexy Venezuelan women who dig lecherous old Gringos, or their wallets. 3) Girlie bars. And though these bars offer far less quality and quantity than found in similar type Asian establishments, they still provide stimulating entertainment. 4) The Spanish language, which I enjoy practicing. The truth is, I’m bored with English after speaking in it for 48 years. Spanish, on the other hand, is a trip to talk, especially after a few or more drinks.
Now the cons: 1) No decent restaurants. The Holiday Inn “gourmet” restaurant, supposedly one of the top eateries on the island, served coleslaw and french fries to complement my main dish. And that’s about as good as it gets on this uncultured rock. No wonder Robin Leach has yet to feature Margarita Island on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. 2) The island lacks the amenities that a spoiled Gringo would appreciate. In other words, it doesn’t rate with the Caribbean in terms of offering a readily available high standard of living.
The bottom line is that Margarita Island, despite lacking desirable niceties, is my kind of place. I can live quite happily without the luxuries offered in America, or even the Caribbean. It is definitely an island I plan on re-visiting and it is possibly a place where I could end up living.
Note: Due to my ice cream tangent, this Margarita Island report is far longer than I anticipated, Consequently, I will pause here and then continue in a few days with my Asia narrative. That post will be titled “Caribbean Tour and Asian Experience, Part 2 (Continued).”
Margarita Island, which is part of Venezuela, is home to a few offshore sportsbooks: Skybook, Margarita, and Players Only. (If I’m missing a book, someone let us know.) The only one that I currently play with is Skybook. I had briefly played with Margarita a couple of years ago when they absorbed my E-Z Bet account, but because they weren’t online I never re-upped when I blew-out the money in the account.
Roger of WWTS, my trip coordinator, had first connected me with Lance, one of the 3 co-owners of Skybook. Once I arrived on the island, Lance and Art, also a co-owner, served as my hosts. And what hosts these guys were! Naturally, they got me special rates on my hotel and rental car. Beyond that, they wined and dined me every night, and even paid for table dances at the girlie bars. Not only do these guys know how to have a good time, they also know how to be generous and include others. Whenever we went out, they would invite one or more employees of Skybook to join us and share in the fun. And everywhere we went, Lance and Art were loved for being great guys and generous tippers.
When I first arrived, I got to see Skybook’s old office, which looked like it had close to a hundred stations. When I left, 6 days later, they had just moved into a new building. Unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to see the new office. When I return, and I definitely want to, I’ll visit the new facilities.
The third co-owner of Skybook is Mitch (a.k.a. Sky). My only interaction with Mitch was a brief greeting when I toured the old office. My take is that you need a crow bar to pry Mitch away from the computer screen. The man is obviously too intent on his BM business to waste time socializing.
Skybook is a partnership that makes sense. Art and Lance are from New York, and are thus able to command a large customer base from the true #1 sportbetting state in the USA. And Mitch is from Vegas, and brings in big players from there. Since much of their clientele comes from New York and Vegas, it is easy to understand why Skybook is an office that has an abnormally high percentage of wiseguys playing into it.
Each partner handles a different sport and employs a different booking philosophy. Art, for example, takes a conservative approach to making and moving lines. Lance, on the other hand, who is charge of their baseball lines, is quite opinionated. Consequently, since Lance will offer a 10-cent baseball line, and he has the balls and knowledge to vary his numbers considerably from the consensus line, Skybook could very well prove to be the industry-leading offshore book this coming baseball season.
In my opinion, Art and Lance are completely honorable straight shooters, and I now have no worries about maintaining a large balance with them. I even told them that I had been concerned during baseball when they went to all post-up and started offering very different baseball lines. And they understood my concern, which, of course, is now zilch.
It is obvious that Skybook is very successful. In addition to moving their office to fancy new digs, these guys have bought homes and investment property on the island, and they will soon buy their own girlie bar. Undoubtedly, they will lure the best-looking women on the island to work for them. What I have to do is to convince them to advertise in Caracas (the capital of Venezuela) for dancers. Caracas has some of the most beautiful women in the world. If they can bring in some knockouts from there, they can turn Margarita Island into one of the top Latin American sex havens in the world. And the next time I visit, I’ll certainly stay much longer than 6 days.
Interestingly enough, Players Only (run by Patrick) already owns a bar on the island: Fat Boys. It is a disco bar that plays loud “techno” music. As everyone knows, alcohol kills brain cells. However, the brain cells destroyed by alcohol are nothing compared to those decimated by loud techno music. Combine the two and you get a deadly synergistic combination that in a few nights can reduce your IQ by 20 points.
When I walked over to Fat Boys, I saw guys staggering out of the bar, mumbling something to the effect that prior to visiting Fat Boys they had been 57% handicappers, and that now, after a few sessions at Fat Boys, their winning percentage had dropped to 47%. No wonder Patrick invites his winning players to visit Margarita Island.
One night at a girlie bar, Lance and Art and I were drinking with Justin and Jeremy from Margarita Sportsbook. And Justin, who had learned from Bettorsworld that I was a Haagen-Dazs addict, asked me if I knew about the Haagen-Dazs ice cream store in the nearby Rattan Center. Hell, I was insulted by the question. I mean, asking me if I know about the nearest Haagen-Dazs outlet is like asking Bubba Clinton if he knows about the closest source for Viagra. Naturally, I knew about that Haagen-Dazs outlet, especially since it was the only place on the entire island where one could procure this incomparable gourmet ice cream.
Now, I’m sure that many of you are asking why Haagen-Dazs is such an incomparable gourmet ice cream. And some of you who are fettered by undeveloped taste buds may even, in your sentient ignorance, prefer Ben & Jerry’s. Well, live in confusion and ignorance no more. This true ice cream Guru will enlighten everyone in Bettorsworld as to the reasons for the superiority of Haagen-Dazs. Simply meditate deeply on the soon-to-follow reasons for the superiority of Haagen-Dazs, and you too can become a respected Master in the arcane field of ice creamism.
Before listing the advantages of Haagen-Dazs, I want to diverge a bit and talk about Ben and Jerry, the guys who own Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. Ben and Jerry are super nice guys who have done a lot of good things for Vermont, the state they live in. Furthermore, like yours truly, each guy is Jewish and a died in the wool Deadhead (Grateful Dead fanatic). I really love these guys. Unfortunately, there is just one problem: I don’t care for their ice cream. I got real excited when Cherry Garcia ice cream debuted, but then I tasted it, and ick! Furthermore, it is my theory (and probably Oliver Stone’s, too) that Cherry Garcias may have contributed to Jerry Garcia’s demise. There is no doubt that Jerry did himself no good by hammering heroin into his veins on a regular basis. But check out his gut. You get a gut like that from sucking down too many Cherry Garcias. Anyway, to make a long story short, I am so ashamed and upset that two fellow Jews can produce an ice cream that bad, I have renounced Judaism. Now, when Passover arrives, I simply pass it over. I have even renounced my membership in the Sandy Koufax fan club and discarded my Sammy Davis Jr. albums. Hell, I even started eating pork. Anyway, now that I have unburdened my heart in Bettorsworld, let me first wipe away my tears and then continue with the list of reasons for Haagen-Dazs’s superiority...Here goes:
1. Haagen-Dazs is made with all natural ingredients and contains no preservatives or chemical additives. (Most commercial ice creams contain pernicious ingredients like mono and diglycerides and polysorbate 80, which, as anyone who reads trade magazines on food engineering know, is even more harmful to one’s health than polysorbate 90.)
2. Haagen-Dazs contains no corn syrup. If you ever check the list of ingredients in cheap ice cream products or low-fat dairy products (such as frozen yogurt), you will notice that corn syrup is near the front. That means that a high percentage of the product contains this cheap, sickly tasting sweetener that is often used to mask taste deficiencies or the absence of fat.
3. Haagen-Dazs contains no carrageenan. Carrageenan is fancy name for seaweed. It adds a false sticky, gooey texture to ice cream. The only sportbetting people who could ever prefer carrageenan in their ice cream are the guys at Looselines, who obviously have a mermaid fetish.
4. Haagen-Dazs has no air pumped into it. I can understand adding air to tires and balloons, and even shoes. But what is the purpose of adding air to ice cream? In reality, what it does is fill up space, making you falsely think that you are getting more ice cream for your money. A pint of air-free Haagen Dazs weighs the same as most quarts of the cheap commercial, chemical-laden stuff. The fact that Haagen-Dazs is denser due to its lack of air also means that its flavor is richer and more intense.
5. Haagen-Dazs simply tastes the best. The late great football coach George Allen, a perfectionist if there ever were one, and a self-admitted ice cream addict, swore by Haagen-Dazs. And that is why I now have a picture of George on my living room wall, right next to those of the Poker Players and Billy Walters.
Now, although I was able to satisfy my Haagen-Dazs cravings at the local Rattan Center, the price for the ice cream was outrageous. In Nevada, I pay roughly $3.25 for a pint of the stuff. And in St. Marteen/St. Martin and Aruba (Note: I couldn’t find it in Curacao), a pint cost $4.75. But at the Rattan Center, they ripped me off for $7.25 a pint.
In fact, this unconscionable price fixing is dastardly enough to have even caused repercussions in the sportsbetting industry. For proof, consider the following facts: The biggest mystery in the offshore industry has long been why Del Mar and Looseline left lovely Margarita Island for the god-forsaken hinterlands of Belize. This mystery has ranked right up there with Mona Lisa’s smile and the riddle of the Sphinx. Well, now I have solved the mystery. These guys deserted Margarita because of unacceptable Haagen Dazs prices. They just got sick of the price fixing scam and headed to Belize.
Although Del Mar and Looselines chose to switch rather than fight, you better believe that I won’t take such price-gouging lying down. Although I hate politics and governments, in this instance it was imperative that I become actively involved. With this in mind, I have sent letters to the U.S. government insisting that it enforce an oil embargo against Venezuela until its Haagen Dazs prices are in line with those of other countries of the world.
In fact, I feel so strongly about this issue, I am even supporting George Bush Senior (not Junior) for president. Not only does George Sr. have the backing of Texas oil money (and power), which could put the clamps on Venezuela, he also exhibits impeccable personal behavior. I have the utmost respect for George Sr. The fact that this man can get still “do” Barbara absolutely amazes me. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think Barbara is a great lady, far sweeter than Hilary. And I couldn’t think of any gal that I’d rather have bake me a batch of chocolate chip cookies. But the truth is, they could main-line mega-doses of Viagra into my genitalia, and I still couldn’t get “it” up for Barbara. I admit it. George Bush is a far better man then I am. George Bush Jr. on the other hand, suffers from the same kind of dissolute personal habits that have plagued Bubba Clinton and Ted Kennedy. In terms of person comportment, he even reminds me of myself. I prefer a president like Bush Sr., Ronald Reagan, or Jimmy Carter (who confessed to lust in his heart but not in his crank) that doesn’t stray from the straight and narrow. The president is a leader and role model who needs to be held to a higher standard of moral behavior than do common, degenerate blokes like myself.
Well, enough of ice creamism for now. It is time to assess the pros and cons of Margarita Island. First, the pros: 1) Fantastic, nearly deserted beaches. And some of these beaches have great waves for surfing.
2) Passionate, sexy Venezuelan women who dig lecherous old Gringos, or their wallets. 3) Girlie bars. And though these bars offer far less quality and quantity than found in similar type Asian establishments, they still provide stimulating entertainment. 4) The Spanish language, which I enjoy practicing. The truth is, I’m bored with English after speaking in it for 48 years. Spanish, on the other hand, is a trip to talk, especially after a few or more drinks.
Now the cons: 1) No decent restaurants. The Holiday Inn “gourmet” restaurant, supposedly one of the top eateries on the island, served coleslaw and french fries to complement my main dish. And that’s about as good as it gets on this uncultured rock. No wonder Robin Leach has yet to feature Margarita Island on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. 2) The island lacks the amenities that a spoiled Gringo would appreciate. In other words, it doesn’t rate with the Caribbean in terms of offering a readily available high standard of living.
The bottom line is that Margarita Island, despite lacking desirable niceties, is my kind of place. I can live quite happily without the luxuries offered in America, or even the Caribbean. It is definitely an island I plan on re-visiting and it is possibly a place where I could end up living.
Note: Due to my ice cream tangent, this Margarita Island report is far longer than I anticipated, Consequently, I will pause here and then continue in a few days with my Asia narrative. That post will be titled “Caribbean Tour and Asian Experience, Part 2 (Continued).”
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